First and foremost since this relates to fandom specifically, and it's not limited to this forum but ALL of Buffyverse fandom:
I can't stand the idea of "Shipping". In fact, I can't stand that word at all.
Bangel, Cangel, Spuffy....all of those combo-word acronyms are the biggest pet-peeve I have about Buffyverse fandom.
I think those non-words are unbelievably stupid to say and to spell.
I don't use short-form for texting or MSN Messenger, I use full words. That's a big part of why I hate these acronyms because they not only look and sound stupid, but I just say to myself whenever I see them "just spell the f**king words out, it's not that hard". None of this "2 bad 4 u" nonsense. I'd rather see someone with terrible spelling make the effort than do that.
At the same time, my dislike of "shipping" has nothing to do with those. It's an entirely separate issue:
I don't like the shipping idea because all it does is create not only fan conflict, but an incredible bias and a series of absolute, either/or thinking taken to an extreme that is just tiring and annoying to have to put up with. That bias overrides all reason at times, which seems to be the sole reason a fan likes something, or dislikes something. It's completely ridiculous. (White Avenger insulted me by saying I was ridiculous because I thought the shipping concept itself was ridiculous when he made it a point to bombard a new member with the shipping slogan he has as a signature...)
Well, if he reads this now he knows why I think it's ridiculous. I don't think he is ridiculous, but for him to think I am just proves my point.
The extremes are so unreasonable and all they do is create reasons to love something and hate something - usually the latter. Willow and Tara, fine. Willow and Oz, fine. Shippers seem to be more like: Willow and Tara, NOT Willow and Oz, or Buffy and Spike, NOT Buffy and Angel.
That self-imposed need to love one OR the other, love one, HATE the other, and everything it stood / stands for, is just too unreasonable for this fan.
I have no preference for these relationships on either show, one way or another. People don't live in absolutes, so there's no reason for characters to either. People move on, change and that's realistic. Shipping isn't when it does nothing but start arguments and give excuses to bash something. Kind of pointless in having conversations when such a strong bias exists. Personally, it makes me want to forget the whole thing and go elsewhere.
I suppose that's more than enough for me to set me apart from other Buffy fans, and I make no apologies for it. "Ship" all you want, fine. Just don't expect me to adopt that extreme either / or attitude that seems to go along with it.
There is when you were insulted by that member without reason.