I know, (almost) all of the cast & crew say Buffy/Angel are soulmates. I'll post my thoughts that I posted awhile ago else where. I've posted this so many times, that I just wrote it up on a notepad and saved it 😛
Here goes:
I've been putting alot of thought into things lately, and first I'm gonna start with how people say Spuffy was the "mature" love and Bangel was just a "teenage first love" thing.
In my opinion, its always been Bangel that has been the mature loving relationship. That act like a married couple.
In a graveyard. Angel and Buffy are fighting a pair of vampires. Buffy trips her opponent into Angel's legs.
Buffy: Sorry, honey!
Angel: That's okay.
They finish off both vampires.
Buffy: You never take me any place new.
Angel: What about that fire demon nest in the cave by the beach? I felt that was a nice change of pace.
See what I mean? Just like a married couple. So cute.
The way I saw Spuffy, was that it was about making the wrong choices.
I get how people can like Spuffy in Season 5, yea. But, Season 6 Spuffy.... there was nothing even slightly romantic about that relationship.
Besides, I never fully got Spuffy. They always hated each other, and all of a sudden out of the blue Spike decides to get warm fuzzy feelings for her. Even though I didn't start to dislike Spike's character until Season 6, I think the downfall of his character was Season 5.
Bangel I loved right away. You could see the attraction between the two when they first met. And it was never just a teenage love like most Spuffy's say it is. It developed into a very powerful love. One not even death could part. Its the meant to be one. And when everything is done, its not Spike Buffy is going to be running to, and its not Cordelia that Angel is going to be running to. Those were just like... office romances. Nothing compared to what Buffy and Angel have.
Angel and Buffy had a mutual love of one another. That's the most important difference between B/A and B/S, and one that's often ignored. Too many times people equate the fact that B/S could have sex with the idea that it was a happy and loving relationship. Buffy made clear that her liasons with Spike in s6 were not making her happy.
Angel loved Buffy from the begining. Neither was obsessed with the other, they BOTH wanted to be with the other. In s4/5/6 Spike basically forces his way into Buffy's life. All through season 6 Buffy makes it very clear that she doesn't love him. It becomes very clear that this is something he can't deal with in "Seeing Red" when he tries to rape her, that in itself is an act of desperation born of obsession.
Now for the Angel leaving thing, which constantly gets thrown at us Bangels. I was actually very proud of Angel when he did let her go. Call me crazy, but to me that just showed how much he truly loved Buffy. He knew that he could never give her a normal life, and whats best for her was important to him. As the old saying goes, "If you love someone, set them free. And if they come back to you, it was meant to be."
I think it was better this way for the time being. To quote DB, ""Their story's not over. Their parting in the season finale was actually a blessing. It will help them rediscover something about themselves to make their relationship stronger."
They may lead different lifes right now, but that doesn't change anything. And yea, Buff may have been a teenage when she meant Angel, but just because she has went from a teenage into a woman, I don't believe that changes her feelings for Angel. Love can surpass time and change. And plus, abstinence makes the heart grow fonder. Everytime they meet after a long time, they end up kissing. Its always gonna be like that, as we saw in "Forever." They'll never be over each other, or be able to fully move on. To me, it begins and ends with them. Anyone else that comes in their lifes, is just there to pass the time until they are once again re-united. And as Joss said, "Every time they come together it has enormous power, enormous meaning.."
First love? Yea. True Love? Yup. Just a teenage love? Nope. I don't believe that. Teenage love isn't that strong or powerful, I should know. It only lasts for alittle while, until you forget them and move on. It doesn't last through years. And you wouldn't really be willing to give up your life for that person, or make sacrifices for just a teenage love. Teenage love is Owen, and Scott.
I believe what I am shown. I was never shown Buffy loved Spike. Not once. But I was shown that she did love Angel. Very deeply. And visa versa for him. And I believe that they are True Loves, not to mention almost all the crew said they were True loves, and some say Eternal Love. Oh, as Steven DeKnight said, there were B/A undertones in Anya's speech in All The Way, "Buffy also met the one person she was meant to be with - but the universe didn't allow them a happy ending."
And then there is B/A undertones in AtS. Like when Angel said, "Do have any idea what its like to be so much apart of someone, that you don't know where they end and you begin?" or we can just go with my favorite, quoting Wesley here, "Angel's moment of true happiness occurred because he was with Buffy. You realize how rare that is - true happiness?"
Then there is book quotes, "Buffy the Vampire Slayer was, is, and always will be Angel's soulmate. She knows it, and he knows it, and though she has tried to move on, all other men walk in the sunlight. Angel is her shadow side, the TRUE other half of her, and though they cannot be together as lovers, no man or God, or Powers That Be can sever the deep bond between them". - The Angel Casefiles, published 2002
To me, there is just so many signs pointing to the fact that they are true loves. I've yet to see one for Spuffy. All signs point to no when I look at them together. Even during Season 7. I just can't see that Spike/Buffy are meant to be, nor can I see that Buffy really loves Spike. She will always be in love with Angel. Not even Spike can come between that. I mean, if death can't come between it, certainly Spike can't.
