In the U.S. military, soldiers are required to follow any lawful orders given to them by a superior officer, REGARDLESS of whether it will get them killed or how stupid it is. When the Potentials first showed up, they were all ready to fall in line, learn how to be Slayers, and be part of the Slayer army fighting the First.
You're comparing the Potentials to U.S. Army soldiers? Are you kidding? Buffy never had that kind of authority over them. She never had the right to hunt them down and put them behind bars if they had decided to go AWOL.
So, while I think Buffy might not have been thinking in terms of the group--because going back in to the vineyard is exactly what she would do while on her own--the Potentials had no right to question her authority and kick her out.
I'm amazed at how hypocritical people can be. Honestly. In the past seasons, when Buffy continuously resisted Giles' attempt to keep her on the Slayer path and disregard her private life, the viewers cheered Buffy. When she resisted and eventually rejected the authority of the Watchers' Council, the fans cheered. When she resisted the authority of the Initiative, the fans cheered.
Buy when Buffy became an authority figure in Season 7 and ended up being rejected by the Potentials for her own flaws and bad judgement calls . . . the fans condemned them for not blindly following her.
Apparently, it was okay for Buffy to resist or reject authority figures. But when she became an authority figure - and not a very good one at that, the fans decided that no one had the right to resist or reject her.
I also find it interesting that Giles was the one person who had received the least criticism from the fans. He was the one who had insisted that Buffy lead the Potentials. He was the one who had taught her to be a killer, instead of a leader. And when she failed to become an effective leader - no surprise there - he was the one who constantly complained about her ineffectiveness. And then to make matters worse, he betrayed her by trying to get Spike killed behind her back . . . and never expressed any remorse for his actions. Naturally this pissed off Buffy. But when she finally rejected his role as her authority figure, he became resentful and even more critical . . . and stabbed her in the back, again. And yet, the fans ended up expressing hostility toward characters like the Potentials (especially Kennedy and Rona), Robin Wood, Dawn and the Scoobies. I guess as a long established authority figure, Giles was exempt from their hostility. Well, from the hostility of most fans. There are those who keep claiming that Giles had changed during Season 7. And there were those who condemned him as much as they condemned the others. By the way, I don't think that Giles had changed. I think that Buffy's view of him had.
If there is one thing I will condemn all of them - Dawn, the Potentials, the Scoobies, Wood and Giles - for is tossing Buffy out of her house. It was her house. If they did not want to follow her, they should have left. But Buffy is also to blame for allowing them to kick her out of her own home.