Spike's "attempted rape" of Buffy in Seeing Red

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Way to screw up an entire post, Maddy....

I have been around on other boards for many years and have only recently joined this one, thinking it might be interesting to discuss and DEBATE intelligently over Buffy, however I am now seriously questioning my decision.

I would be asking WHY you cannot stick with the subject at hand

The subject is Spikes "attempted rape" of Buffy. You're the one who strayed off the subject and brought your own issues into it.

I wonder... it seems you want to ignore everything that happened before the "attempted rape" as evidence of why it happened. I mean, its obvious with Buffy behaviour why events happened the way they did.. How much do you relate to the Buffy character of season 6? 🙂

Maybe a little too much, eh, "sweetheart".:bandit:
 
A
arabella
exactly
Okay. I wasn't about to bother to add anything else TO this thread, because I had said what I believed, and was happy with it. Which is
(well, on all the other boards I belong to anyway) the whole POINT of a discussion board, but there is no way I am going to let some complete stranger treat me like that.

I have been around on other boards for many years and have only recently joined this one, thinking it might be interesting to discuss and DEBATE intelligently over Buffy, however I am now seriously questioning my decision. This is a prime example of why.

I Administrate my own board as well as modding on another one and if this were my board and you spoke to me OR more importantly, one of my members like that, I would be asking WHY you cannot stick with the subject at hand and how dare you, HOW DARE YOU tell a person, ANY person who has suffered ANY form of sexual assault, attack or rape to "get over themselves?" I have a feeling you are a man, because no woman would say something as insensitive as that.

In your time as an admin on other boards, did you ever come across the correct use of the 'Quote' function, if not PM me and i'll give you a stpe by step guide🙂
Yes i am a man, so what. Now its only women that can suffer at the hands of a rapist, no, and talk about sexist, trust me there are women that say worse.
Listen, you have a sob story, fair enough, you let it cloud your judgement, thats your prerogative, but if you want to try and compare your situation and Buffy's and claim Buffy has no fault what so ever, then I, along with others that have, will tell you how wrong you are. You need to get a grip on reality.
This debate/discussion is about the entire senario, events leading to, the act itself and the outcome, yet you have purely focused on the act itself and made it out to be something its not.
Do i care if i have offended you, frankly no because you are obviously talking out of your arse.
I'm not even sure you have been assaulted, more then likely you are one of the few that 'pretends' to make their point seem valid.

The reason I mentioned that fact was because I was EXPLAINING the fact, that IF you have been in that situation, which I KNOW not everybody has, and NEVER SAID everybody has or that I was the only person! I KNOW that other people on this thread, (from reading their comments, which I have done though I wonder whether YOU have) have felt just as annoyed about this subject as me and have also been victims/attempted victimes of this crime. Seriously! Someone tell me! WHERE exactly in this thread do I say "oh dear me. Pooor me, I am the only person to have ever been raped...?" I didn't and I don't. So don't make up lies about me.

Not that it is ANY of your business but i have been in a situation like this with the exception that it passed the 'attempted' stage, so frankly your 'boohoo, you don't understand attitude because you are a man' phase disgusts me. You want sympathy, go to your friends, you want people who aren't emotionally attached to speak the truth as they see it, post online, but do NOT for one second cry foul when they don't agree with your skewered definitions.
You constantly, in most of your posts actually, compare this situation with your own, and honestly, i'm sure they are completely different.

(Which you would know if you had bothered to actually READ my post properly before launching that personal attack on me, which makes me wonder more what kind of board this is if people just can't stick to the subject at hand without getting personal about it.)
You're a Moron, You're a Moron, You're a Moron.
THATS a personal attack.
"My Dear Lord, can you get over yourself, you aren't the only person to be in a similar situation, and i know 100% you aren't the only person who has been raped and/or the brunt of an attempt within this very conversation."
THAT is a reply to your constant attempts to make everyone feel like you know what you are talking about because you "have" been "sexually assaulted".
This was(and still is) about an entire seasons worth of abuse from one character to another who inturn finally let go and did a terrible thing, but the constant comments about your own experience, that is still questionable in my mind, trying to project them onto a Vampire and Slayer is beyond pathetic.

Why are you so adamant on changing my point of view and unaccepting of the fact that my view is my view and I will not change it, just because you say so? You can attack me personally all you like but it only shows how unaccepting you sadly seem to be of anyone who doesn't understand or share your viewpoint? Is this one of those places where, if everyone doesn't agree 100% people turn on them and attack them until they do?
You know where the door is, cause i can show you!
I have no problem when someones view point is different to mine, what i DO have a problem with is when people disregard the information and superimpose their own feelings onto an event and make it about them, WHICH IS WHAT YOU DO!

Because that's what that paragraph is to me. A personal verbal outright attack for absolutely no reason other than the fact that I believe Spike attempted to rape Buffy. I mean Jeez!
It's a t.v programme!! Is it really worth being THAT insulting about and getting THAT wound up over?
But thats just the point, you either haven't watched season 6 or too ignorant of anything but the actual event to understand why Spike did it.
You are trying to come across as learned in this field, but your comments show an intense lack of knowledge and understandind.

Why do I "Need" to understand that exactly, especially when I disagree? Why can't you accept the fact that I don't agree with your opinion? I have watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and that particular episode probably as many times as you have and all I see is an attempted rape. Buffy asks Spike to leave and says she doesn't want him there. If he doesn't understand that it is his problem, not hers.
See...'all I see is an attempted rape' thats your problem. You missed the entire point of the season, you have ignored the relationship how it has worked so that it can fit with your personal theory that every single rape/attempted rape case is the sole responsibility of the person commiting the crime.
In most case i would agree, but this one on Buffy that we are discussing, this is about how she abused him for months and when he finally snapped in the only way he could, it led to this assault. She had used and abused him, making him believe things, making him want things, then with no real explanation drops him. I will not defend Spikes actions in the act itself, but i WILL defend him when all the blame is placed at his door by people like you who are totally ignorant of the FACTS of that particular relationship.

No, she shouldn't have slept with him earlier maybe, but she recognised that and finished with him. The fact he was not only attempting to rape her, but also following her after she broke it off with him and making a "Buffy-Bot" doll of her shows he was obsessive and was beyond the point of listening to reason. He was determined to get her to love him once more no matter what it took when she had made it clear that is not what she wanted. That does not make her the one who has "encouraged" the behaviour in anyway. She said no! No is no!

See, thats where your argument fails.
Firstly, Rape in this senario was not about the sex for either of them
She needed to feel something, even if it was disgust, she used him and abused him.
He loved her, he wanted to give her what he had to offer and what she TOOK.
Also, yeah, he loved her, it was hard for him to get passed that, which culminated in the Anya/Spike sex scene that Buffy ran to and showed her intense jealousy at what had happened. Spike is emotionally retarded in this case, its obvious.
Where does the Buffy-Bot come into the rape sequence?
The Buffy-Bot was an entire year earlier....yeah really sure you have seen this episode alot now!!!
Again, no one has said she encouraged him on the night.
You really need to read the posts. No one has said she deserved it either.
What has been said is that she wound him and wound him then snapped and let him go. The when its just dissipating she returns to him and shows complete jealousy at his actions with Anya.

How long have you known me? How many people who have been raped have you known? How can you just generalise like that and assume someone who has been raped will treat every situation exactly the same? Have you ever spoken to me outside of this thread? On any other boards? In real life? No? Therefore, what kind of arrogance is that to assume you know that I have, or would treat ANY situation the same?
That is, quite frankly, the most immature and contradictory judgement I have ever heard in my life. What are you, 5?

Ohh damn straight i am arrogant, i have no worries of admitting it, but your constant whining about this shows your lack of ability to deal with the issues of your own life and project them onto two very different characters on a TV show, so you can try and win a point.
Its not contradictory, had i said 'wow you have handled it well' followed by these comments THEN its contradictory.

That is because rape is a serious issue, which you might realise if you bothered to learn about it, did some research into it, talked to people who had been raped, etc, as well as those who haven't but whose families have been affected by it, and I know MANY. I have several friends who have also been through this terrible ordeal, therefore I was speaking not only for myself, but also on their behalf, as well as on behalf of those who want to say something but get afraid because of arrogant reactions like this. So don't assume to know who I am or what I am thinking and especially throw lies at me that I never even said.
Hahahaha, yeah, i'm sure. Well then there is another issue isnt there, speaking on behalf of others.
I have been through something similar myself and show a different view point, i'm sure that NO ONES view is the same as yours, but if it helps you get through your own life others ordeals the same as yours then knock yourself out, but DO NOT come on here and make out that you are talking on behalf of all your 'friends' and people on here because you really arent.
You want to live in a Black and white World where the Bad Guy is obvious, you do that, but don't expect anyone to agree with you because they might have a different insight.

I know people have different attitudes. I'm not the one who seems to have a problem with that am I? You're the one who can't accept the fact that I disagree with you, so therefore. whole last paragaraph is a contradiction in itself. I was merely discussing my point on a discussion board. Not trying to change anyone's views, but it seems many people are trying to change mine and those are the people I am speaking to.
I have no issue with you disagreeing, i have major issues with your lack of understanding and your obvious attempt to try and make every rape case just like yours...."I have several friends who have also been through this terrible ordeal, therefore I was speaking not only for myself, but also on their behalf, as well as on behalf of those who want to say something but get afraid because of arrogant reactions like this." in case you need reminding of a time you have made other cases out to be like yours.

You won't change your opinion, fine, i really don't care, you can live in a world of blissful ignorance for the rest of your life if you want, just don't assume because you feel this way everyone else in a similar situation feels the same.

I think you need to take your own "advice" and learn about how to respect opinions that differ FROM yours before you go labelling people you don't even know.
This entire post of yours has given me plenty more labels i could give you, but there are children around....but kudos, the Quote Function here was right🙂
 
In your time as an admin on other boards, did you ever come across the correct use of the 'Quote' function, if not PM me and i'll give you a stpe by step guide🙂

Yes, but I am more interested in getting my point across, than making
meaningless comments such as that.


Yes i am a man, so what. Now its only women that can suffer at the hands of a rapist, no, and talk about sexist, trust me there are women that say worse.

So now I am having more words put in my mouth? Where did I say that? I didn't and that is a stupid thing to insinuate. The only thing I said was I could tell you were a man because of the insensitivity of your statement in general. NOT towards me, because it takes a lot more to offend me than someobody like you.


Listen, you have a sob story, fair enough, you let it cloud your judgement, thats your prerogative, but if you want to try and compare your situation and Buffy's and claim Buffy has no fault what so ever, then I, along with others that have, will tell you how wrong you are. You need to get a grip on reality.
This debate/discussion is about the entire senario, events leading to, the act itself and the outcome, yet you have purely focused on the act itself and made it out to be something its not.

The reason I have not responded to the "others" is because I was initially responding to YOUR comments after my post. That was simply there because YOU, not me, YOU, have such a pathetic need for control that you will use whatever means necessary, even if it means telling lies about things people have said or not said and putting words into their mouth to try to get them to agree with you. If you think that is the way to "get" people to listen to, or agree with you, you have another think coming.

I have noticed several people on this thread have very similar views to me, but because of people like you telling them how "wrong" their views are and trying to change their minds, instead of respecting their right to their own opinions, they have basically left the thread and probably realised that you are beyond reasoning with or understanding any viewpoint but your own.

Listen, there is only one person in this entire thread who needs to get a grip on reality and it certainly isn't me. In an earlier post you make on this very thread, you even go as far as to say that, now, BUFFY is the one who should be charged with rape!! You completely change your views throughout this thread to reflect popular opinion. Do you even know what rape and attempted rape actually is? Why don't you go look it up in a dictionary, if you can move away from your computer screen long enough to do so, or better yet show me the episode where Buffy rapes Spike.

You can't, because there isn't one. Nothing is clouding my judgement. Spike is even my favourite character, but just because of that it doesn't mean I have to agree with everything he ever does. He is what he is, a monster. I am calling this situation as I see it. I have focused on the act because THAT is the title of the thread. Even The Watcher who started this thread seemed to acknowledge that there would be different takes on this subject, which is because rape is such a controversial subject. Whenever you start ANY thread you have to acknowledge that there will be different points of view and it is open to both negative and positive feedback. You don't seem to be doing that, but rather looking for ways to slate anyone who disagrees with you, which again shows me you are past reasoning with.

Even if I do take into consideration the build-up of events, which I also have. it doesn't matter, I still believe that Spike is responsible for his actions, so get over it already.


Do i care if i have offended you, frankly no because you are obviously talking out of your arse.
I'm not even sure you have been assaulted, more then likely you are one of the few that 'pretends' to make their point seem valid.
Not that it is ANY of your business but i have been in a situation like this with the exception that it passed the 'attempted' stage, so frankly your 'boohoo, you don't understand attitude because you are a man' phase disgusts me. You want sympathy, go to your friends, you want people who aren't emotionally attached to speak the truth as they see it, post online, but do NOT for one second cry foul when they don't agree with your skewered definitions.
You constantly, in most of your posts actually, compare this situation with your own, and honestly, i'm sure they are completely different.


Um, no, I am (unlike you) speaking honestly. YOU are the one making things up that I have or have not said and calling Buffy a rapist. YOU are the one telling me I have done things and said things and then not providing me with examples to back them up. YOU are the one giving me orders when it is not your place, or your business to do so here (or yours, arabella) as well as which, YOU are the one who cannot get a grip on the fact that people have different opinions to you and because of that you make it personal instead of sticking to the subject, which let me remind you, again, is "Spike's "attempted" rape of Buffy. "

Again, WHERE have I said I wanted anyone to understand me or my experiences? That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard. Where do I "constantly" compare the Buffy and Spike situation with my own? I don't, but again all I was trying to do was explain what happens with the strength thing (not from a personal or emotional point of view) but from a point of view of a woman being held down by a vampire. That does not mean I think I am Buffy or understand the situation, but that I was trying to explain why Buffy could not break free of Spike, from a TECHNICAL point of view. Yes, she kicked him off, but because of the way he was holdin her wrists I meant (and said quite clearly) that I can understand the way her wrists are being held which is why she struggles AT FIRST.

I have not continually brought any of my own experiences into it time and time again. I have asked for examples of me doing that and they have been ignored while you repeat the same thing over and over again without any proof. FIND an example and show me what you mean. Again you can't, because there isn't one.



["My Dear Lord, can you get over yourself, you aren't the only person to be in a similar situation, and i know 100% you aren't the only person who has been raped and/or the brunt of an attempt within this very conversation."
THAT is a reply to your constant attempts to make everyone feel like you know what you are talking about because you "have" been "sexually assaulted".

Telling someone to get over themselves is an order from someone who has no business ordcering me around in the first place for absolutely no reason other than the fact they can't understand the fact they are being disagreed with. I have not attempted to make everyone see anything. I have presented FACTS from the show and the episode in particular. I am not about to repeat what I said regarding the technicalities above because anyone with half a brain can see that anyway. I use evidence to present my case which is what you should be doing also if you are that desperate to make me agree with you.


This was(and still is) about an entire seasons worth of abuse from one character to another who inturn finally let go and did a terrible thing, but the constant comments about your own experience, that is still questionable in my mind, trying to project them onto a Vampire and Slayer is beyond pathetic.

See? This is EXACTLY what I mean about you repeating the same thing over and over. You have told me the same things about 5 times within this one post! I heard you and responded the first time, so the fact you are still trying to get me to mention something again which I am not going to, because I have said my piece shows me AGAIN that you are beyond reasoning. AGAIN (sigh) where am I projecting myself as a slayer? You're right, that is beyond pathetic, because you know as well as I do that I never said that. Where is your evidence to back it up?



You know where the door is, cause i can show you!

Really? Well I have checked the leaderboard and since neither you nor arabella are on the moderator list I again am curious as to why you think I would or should "obey" you! What kind of control freak are you anyway to try and police someone else's board?



I have no problem when someones view point is different to mine, what i DO have a problem with is when people disregard the information and superimpose their own feelings onto an event and make it about them, WHICH IS WHAT YOU DO!

Do you have an attention disorder? Why are you asking me the SAME question AGAIN? I have not superimposed my feelings onto anything Give me some PROOF, please of any of this and I will be happy to back it up.



But thats just the point, you either haven't watched season 6 or too ignorant of anything but the actual event to understand why Spike did it.
You are trying to come across as learned in this field, but your comments show an intense lack of knowledge and understandind.

Again, you say I am being ignorant but you have not shown me how. Where am I being ignorant and why? Because Spike chased Buffy in the fist place? Yes, she had sex with him previously to feel something and she said she was using him, which was wrong, I never said it wasn't, but she also ended their relationship. Even though he was a vampire he understood that, but because he wouldn't accept it he attempted to rape her, which again makes him nothing but a stalker IN MY VIEW.

Yes, Buffy knew what he was, but that does not mean she was responsible for being raped and why you think SHE should be charged with rape is just utterly laughable and beyond comprehension.


How do MY commments show a lack of understanding or knowledge? Anyone with eyes can see what happened on the screen, which is what I am basing my facts and responses on. What show have you been watching?



See...'all I see is an attempted rape' thats your problem. You missed the entire point of the season, you have ignored the relationship how it has worked so that it can fit with your personal theory that every single rape/attempted rape case is the sole responsibility of the person commiting the crime.
In most case i would agree, but this one on Buffy that we are discussing, this is about how she abused him for months and when he finally snapped in the only way he could, it led to this assault. She had used and abused him, making him believe things, making him want things, then with no real explanation drops him. I will not defend Spikes actions in the act itself, but i WILL defend him when all the blame is placed at his door by people like you who are totally ignorant of the FACTS of that particular relationship.

The only one ignoring any FACTS here is you, and the fact that you won't, or are incapable of providing any evidence to back up me "being Buffy" or whatever lie just goes to show you have actually added strength to my point and validated my side of the argument. And how do you know I ahve this "theory" about every single situation being the same? WHERE do I say that?! Again, more fabrications. But in Spike's case, it was his fault.




See, thats where your argument fails.
Firstly, Rape in this senario was not about the sex for either of them
She needed to feel something, even if it was disgust, she used him and abused him.
He loved her, he wanted to give her what he had to offer and what she TOOK.
Also, yeah, he loved her, it was hard for him to get passed that, which culminated in the Anya/Spike sex scene that Buffy ran to and showed her intense jealousy at what had happened. Spike is emotionally retarded in this case, its obvious.
Where does the Buffy-Bot come into the rape sequence?
The Buffy-Bot was an entire year earlier....yeah really sure you have seen this episode alot now!!!

Yes, I know this episode was earlier, but since you want me to provide the facts, this is what I am doing. The fact I mentioned that episode is that Spike had an unhealthy obsession with Buffy and this was where it started to build up.


Again, no one has said she encouraged him on the night.
You really need to read the posts. No one has said she deserved it either.
What has been said is that she wound him and wound him then snapped and let him go. The when its just dissipating she returns to him and shows complete jealousy at his actions with Anya.
How does she show complete jealousy? I think she looks more annoyed and shocked and also worried that Xander and Anya will find out she has slept with him, which they do. I have read the posts. Have you?




Ohh damn straight i am arrogant, i have no worries of admitting it, but your constant whining about this shows your lack of ability to deal with the issues of your own life and project them onto two very different characters on a TV show, so you can try and win a point.
Its not contradictory, had i said 'wow you have handled it well' followed by these comments THEN its contradictory.

Oooh you are arrogant? Purlease, what do you want, a medal? I can give as good as I get and I don't take crap from anyone either so if you can't take it don't dish it out.



Hahahaha, yeah, i'm sure. Well then there is another issue isnt there, speaking on behalf of others.
I have been through something similar myself and show a different view point, i'm sure that NO ONES view is the same as yours, but if it helps you get through your own life others ordeals the same as yours then knock yourself out, but DO NOT come on here and make out that you are talking on behalf of all your 'friends' and people on here because you really arent.
You want to live in a Black and white World where the Bad Guy is obvious, you do that, but don't expect anyone to agree with you because they might have a different insight.

Yeah...you really need to look at your advice.


I have no issue with you disagreeing, i have major issues with your lack of understanding and your obvious attempt to try and make every rape case just like yours...."I have several friends who have also been through this terrible ordeal, therefore I was speaking not only for myself, but also on their behalf, as well as on behalf of those who want to say something but get afraid because of arrogant reactions like this." in case you need reminding of a time you have made other cases out to be like yours.

You won't change your opinion, fine, i really don't care, you can live in a world of blissful ignorance for the rest of your life if you want, just don't assume because you feel this way everyone else in a similar situation feels the same.


This entire post of yours has given me plenty more labels i could give you, but there are children around....but kudos, the Quote Function here was right🙂


What other cases have I made out to be like mine? The only one here living in a world of blissful ignorance is you. You are boring me so much now because it's obvious you are incapable of having an intelligent debate with anyone. And I have debated with people who actually are a lot more "arrogant" than you, but I don't think you're arrogant at all, you just shout to be heard because you are scared you won't be. Well it's working because I'm not interested in wasting any more life on some kid like you.
 
A
arabella
projecting: UNCONSCIOUSLY seeing you own emotions in another person and reacting as if that person was feeling as you do. Debate: a discussion b/w 2 people to present ideas in order to change an opinion. i will provide u ex if u want re projection.
P
postmortem
[No message]
The mere fact that Buffy DID not deserve it was said by everyone in this thread. I DO NOT allow myself to be manipulated so i can agree with DDM,
In fact i have disagreed with him on another matter in another forum IN fact you are transfering your own experience onto the one of Buffy, he only said she was allowing Spike to do the things he did to her and when she ULTIMATLY rejected him for good she got burned, cos He did not comply cos he was so used to her saying one thing but doing another. He then saw the horror of what he done which prompted him to get a soul.
IF you tease a man enough he will go beyond his control and be mainly influenced by testestorone and then your in trouble cos they will not know when to stop.THAT has been said to me by someone who was in that situation.SO stop being rude if DDM is rude that is because maybe he is exasperated by you not listening to his veiw...and you just repeating yourself.You disagree by comming across as attacking.
 
The mere fact that Buffy DID not deserve it was said by everyone in this thread. I DO NOT allow myself to be manipulated so i can agree with DDM,
In fact i have disagreed with him on another matter in another forum IN fact you are transfering your own experience onto the one of Buffy, he only said she was allowing Spike to do the things he did to her and when she ULTIMATLY rejected him for good she got burned, cos He did not comply cos he was so used to her saying one thing but doing another. He then saw the horror of what he done which prompted him to get a soul.
IF you tease a man enough he will go beyond his control and be mainly influenced by testestorone and then your in trouble cos they will not know when to stop.THAT has been said to me by someone who was in that situation.SO stop being rude if DDM is rude that is because maybe he is exasperated by you not listening to his veiw...and you just repeating yourself.You disagree by comming across as attacking.

Wait a minute. You first say "Buffy DID not deserve it was said by everyone in this thread" then you say "IF you tease a man enough he will go beyond his control and be mainly influenced by testestorone and then your in trouble cos they will not know when to stop." Do you mean Buffy teased Spike so that he went beyond his control which was influenced by his testestorone, then Buffy was in trouble because Spike didn't know where to stop because he is a man? So what, a man is free to lose control and go all the way? Is he free from general law? Or conscience?
 
M
Maddy
Well said!
So what, a man is free to lose control and go all the way? Is he free from general law? Or conscience?

i don't know what she was getting at, but please remember that Spike was not a man and therefore is free from conscience and general law. If we were talking about a man, not a vampire I would fight this to the death that Buffy was not to blame at all here...but Spike was not a man...apples to apples, oranges to oranges. I am not saying that AV is not contradicting herself, just that the questions that you posed because of it are not applicable.
 
I meant the testosterone bit was an alegory of the teasing Buffy had done to Spike in the past, saying no and saying yes.
Spike thinking that was what was happening again did attempt to mount Buffy
then realising after the fight that she really did mean no this time.
Of course Spike is a vamp, i didn't mean to sound like i was refering him in human terms !
one last thought i really think this topic needs to shut!lol
 
I mark this thread a failure, but a funny failure.

If I beat my son for ten years, and one day he snaps and proceeds to kick the living hell out of me, who is to blame?


Buffy abused Spike for months (there are many things I can quote or reference from season 6, but I'm too lazy and I will assume people actually watched the show), he snapped, ....?

People want to only use the act of rape itself, ignoring its context in the abusive relationship that Buffy had with Spike.

Also, notice the conciseness of this post.

In the biz we call it "The Driveby".
 
A
arabella
;) a failure it is, but it amused me none the less
This one's gone over the 100 post limit so I'll close it.
 
S
Schillaci
That's what you call a driveby. You took out everyone in one fell swoop! Watch out, nerd with an Uzi!
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