Okay Okay this is what I don't get.
Buffy is the bestest slayer ever of all time and like simply at least 270000 times betterer than any other slayer EVER ok? This is stated time and time again and the reasoning behind it is that she has these close relationships. She loves and is loved. She supports and is supported.
Then all of a sudden it's like "D'oh actually the counsel etc were right all along, I SHOULD be isolated and single minded".
The way she changes at the end of seven without then having any real resolution seems to contradict the entire rest of the show.
My explanation - no writer gave a damn about Buffy in S7, it was all about glorifying Spike. Look at it from this angle and everything that happens starts to make sense. Not "ah, a well told story" sense, mind you, more like "so,
that was why they wrote this crap".
Okay, okay, I am bitter, I admit it. But I think you nailed it. Many of the most important messages are completely turned around in the final seasons. At first nerds and losers were heroes. In S6 nerds become not just the bad guys but are ruthlessly mocked too. Early on, research was absolutely paramount. In S7 instead of that Buffy has premonitions or simply goes for plans that work only because the writers say so, Willow sucks at Latin (really, writers, the girl who used to play with medical books when she was little?) and her idea of hacking is using google, while Giles is braindead.
And just as you mentioned, the message about Buffy becomes the exact opposite. Previously her friends were her vital support system. Many an episode make it very clear that without their help and emotional support Buffy would either be dead or not be nearly as effective. to balance this there are examples of Buffy's feelings making her unable to do her job properly, most obvious of which is the Angelus arc. Still, overall, it was very clear that the Scooby bonds of friendship were supposed to be regarded a very positive thing.
In S7 everyone who doesn't have superpowers is regarded as a burden on Buffy's neck and those who do have seem to be useful to her only because of that. Spike is the only one allowed to give Buffy any emotional support and even that is made in a rather stupid fashion that made me almost feel sorry for Spike (and I loathe S7 Spike).
They say that insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
In Dirty Girls, Buffy took everyone to the Vineyard to face Caleb, and got her arse kicked. In Empty Places, Buffy proposes taking everyone to the Vineyard to face Caleb, and expects good results.
Ergo, Buffy is insane.
Well said.
I don't think she's isolated or single minded at the end of season 7. She just understands the gravity of the situation and understand that everyone involved is in her hands.
I might have bought that, had Buffy not being in a life and death situation basically every day since she found out she was a Slayer.